26.10.06

Thursday Thirteen #3

I feel:: hopeful



Thirteen Things about Anias Nin





The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!





1. The other day my dad accused me of talking quietly on purpose to make him think that he was losing his hearing. Yeah, sure Dad. You know, now that I think of it, it's kind of a good idea. It would be a good pay-back for him making me lose my mind.

2. On Monday my Spanish professor told me that I should drop his class because he was "concerned" about me and the fact that I've been absent some from the class. He also said that he feels that I'm behind the other students and that he wouldn't let me go on to another Spanish class without first having the skills from this one. As if being on my period wasn't enough, it was raining and I had forgotten my umbrella. I showered that morning. I shaved my legs. I shaved my armpits. I plucked my eyebrows. I was having a good day. Count it: The second time I have ever totally gone off on one of my professors. (Thank God I had taken my Klonopin that morning.) I started talking really fast and the more I talked the louder my voice got. By the time I was finished, my professor looked like he'd had his hair blown back. The only thing he said was, "Well, don't miss any more classes." Yesterday, in class, he was all smiles and could have won for Mr. Congeniality. I guess he thought I was just meek and would never stand up for myself. I tried to tell him at the beginning of the semester that I'm loca.

3. Also on Monday, I went shopping! Retail therapy rules! I bought a pair of black and white, Zebra striped, fuzzy, Converse sneakers. They were on sale for $20. I freakin' love them.

4. After my little temper flare up with my Spanish professor, I walked to my car trying unsuccessfully not to cry. I mean, who wants to totally lose it in public? I have before, but God, it's embarassing. I got to my car, hyperventilated, cried and then drove over to where Tanya works for coffee. What's different about this is that normally, I would have just gone home. I was really wanting to cut and I knew if I went home that I would. So, I went for coffee and wound up talking to Tanya and Sally, which was also the day of the Almighty Converse purchase[insert Hallelujah chorus here]. So, it turned out to be a good day with just a little shit on it. Not enough that I couldn't wipe it off with some Lysol antibacterial wipes.

5. I'm thinking about going to Celebrate Recovery tonight at the church I've been going to lately, Mercy's Cross. It was so weird on Monday (on the way for coffee) when I called there, I was thinking, "I'll just ask for Pastor Randy." I didn't have to, though, because he answered the phone. Alot of "coincidences" like that have been happening ever since I started going there. I feel like the soundtrack of my life for the past few months should have been, 'Maybe God Is Trying To Tell You Something'.

6. I had to take Dad in yesterday morning at 6:30am for a colonoscopy and an upper G.I. I have no idea why they call that "Upper G.I." It makes me think of the movie 'Full Metal Jacket'. I have no idea why that is either. Anyway....ever heard a chorus of farts? Hang out in the recovery room of your local Gastrointerologist's office. I guarantee you'll come out of there laughing like Beavis and/or Butthead. I did.

7. I keep waiting for the pupeteer to come out from behind Bush and say, "Psych!" and then laugh maniacally like Charles Manson.

8. One day, this last weekend, I woke up and went about my normal morning routine. Part of my routine includes making coffee. Now, I've got this routine down-so down that I can perform it while awake or asleep. Evidently, that morning, I was still asleep. I made the coffee and then realized that I had no creamer for it. Ok, y'all that know me know I like a little coffee with my creamer. I cannot drink coffee without creamer and some kind of non-sugar sweeter (notthepinkstuffnotthepinkstuffnotthepinkstuffnotthepinkstuff). While cursing to myself, I began to look around the kitchen for some kind of suitable substitute. Dad's milk: Definite no. First of all, you never know if the date is expired and secondly I'm allergic to milk. It makes me all snotty. Like that's something I need more of. Thankyouno. You know how when you're looking for something in the kitchen, you have to go through every cabinet umpteenmillion times even though you know that nothing in them has changed? Sometimes, I even open the cabinet doors and just stand in the middle of the kitchen and stare at their contents thinking maybe if I wish hard enough that what I want will just materialize. On this particular morning, I was in the midst of doing this very thing when my eye fell on something I hadn't noticed before: instant French Vanilla Cappuccino. I thought to myself, "That stuff already has creamer in it. I'll just use that." So, along with my Vanilla Biscotti coffee, I dumped four spoonfulls of instant French Vanilla Cappuccino in my coffee cup and stirred it around. It didn't come out the nice milky color that I prefer, but I thought it was better than nothing. I was spun out of my fucking mind for about 12 hours. I felt like I had inhaled a large amout of Meth. Holy Shit. I fucking wiped the walls of my house clean with antibacterial wipes because in addition to the creepy-crawlies I felt on my scalp, I was sure that they had to be on the walls too. Lesson: Always keep coffee creamer handy.

9. Tuesday nights and Friday nights have become my don'tfuckingtalktomeI'mwatchingmyshows tv nights. They're all on Sci-Fi. Yeah. It's a cult I'm sure of it. (Dead Like Me, Eureka, Dr. Who, Heroes...)

10 I feel like my medicine is working and I'm not even at the dosage I'm supposed to be yet. It makes me wonder if, when I finally get there, what I'll feel like. I'm already laughing more, which feels incredibly good. I can't even describe. I'm still down a lot, but not as down. So...moving on....

11. The morning I took Dad for his anal invasion and after he had been taken away by the invaders, I left and went to Starbuck's. I bought a John Mayer cd. I kind of like it. It's bluesy, not emo, like he usually is.

12. While sitting at Starbuck's that morning I got to thinking about how old I am and that it won't be too much longer before I'll have my sacred, exit-only orifice be violated by the dreaded colonoscopy. Which, in turn, got me to thinking how much shorter a time it is before I'll have to make appointments to regularly and willingly put my tits in a vice. Jesus, and I thought the Gyno was bad. I hope they have a bowl full of good drugs next to the suckers at the reception counter.

13. I saw this girl I know from school at school the other day. She always makes me laugh. I don't know what it is about her. All she has to do is just stand there and I somehow find it extremely amusing. Anyway, when I ran into her the other day, the first thing she said was, "You've lost weight!" I said, "You really think so?" She said, "I'm lookin' atcha, aren't I?" I laughed, of course.

Labels:

4 Comments:

Blogger Tracie Nall said...

I want to see the cute shoes!!!
Of course, then I will want a pair.....retail therapy does rule!!

October 26, 2006 8:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The whole list had me rolling, but #8 had coffee coming out of my nose. Glad I found your list, you rock! Have a great weekend, La Chica Loca!

October 26, 2006 9:42 PM  
Blogger Kate said...

You sound good. Makes me glad to know that people are getting saner out there somewhere.

'Cause I'm not. Too damn much chaos in my house to be moving toward sane right now. Maybe next week.

The way you got on #8 day is the way I always am when on coffee... just too much caffeine at once for my tiny little brain to process. And here I am up at 1:00 in the morning and have to be at work by 8:00... I'm thinking tomorrow might be the day. We'll see.

October 27, 2006 1:17 AM  
Blogger Anais Nin said...

Tracie: Ask and you shall receive. :D I'll put a pic of them up soon.

Marsha: I'm glad you got a good giggle!

Kate: I hope the chaos in your house calms down. Thanks for checking up on me. I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets totally schizo on too much caffeine.

October 27, 2006 5:29 PM  

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