I Wish This Trigger Were A Horse

I feel: violated

I was just browsing through my Sitemeter stats a few minutes ago and came across someone who had Google-searched the words, "how to hurt women". What disturbs me is not that my blog came up as a search result, because obviously, I would never list, like, a manual on how to hurt women, or for that matter, anyone. What does disturb me is that someone would actually search for those specific words. It's like they were looking for a textbook or something. It makes me afraid for the women around that particular person, because they don't know that they might be a target.

I realize that I don't know the full story of why this person was Googling this and I realize that I'm having an automatic knee-jerk reaction to it. It could be any number of reasons. I guess I'm just shocked. I shouldn't be, I guess, but I am. I mean, this blog is public and there are any number of people who have access to it. I shouldn't be feeling this way, but I am. I feel like my heart is in a vice grip and I'm having to breathe really shallowly because of it.

Can you say "trigger"? I think you can.


Blogger incurable hippie said...

Oh God this is so awful :( I've felt shit when I've had similarly dodgy search results leading to my blog.

Noone who knows your blog would ever think you would have written an answer to that question, but knowing there are people who would actively search out an answer to that question is disturbing in itself.

Thinking of you xxx

July 09, 2006 6:09 PM  
Blogger Anias Nin said...

Thanks so much for thinking of me, Pippa.

I hope your eyes are getting better. :)

July 09, 2006 7:12 PM  

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